What Does...

Happy Mother's Day mean?

According to Wikipedia Mother's Day is a celebration honoring mothers and motherhood, maternal bonds, and the influence of mothers in society.  It is celebrated on various days in many parts of the world, most commonly in March or May.  It complements Father's Day, a similar celebration honoring Fathers.  The irony to the Wikipedia version is that it doesn't define thoroughly WHAT Happy Mother's Day means.  It even breaks "Mother's Day" into the definitions identified as International History and Tradition.  You can scroll through from A-Z by country.  I personally think that Wikipedia is offering an "information overload" to anyone researching the meaning of Mother's Day.

Now, if you are wondering WHY I elected the day after Mother's Day to research the definition during my lunch hour let me explain.  I had a fantastic Mother's Day.  I was blessed to spend the morning with our (mine and Mark's) youngest Granddaughter.  Granddaddy and Granddaughter fixed me a wonderful "heart-healthy" Mother's Day breakfast.  Then we spent the morning visiting, laughing, and preparing for a Daughter-In-Law brunch where I would serve a favorite family dish of Bar-B-Que that had slowly cooked overnight.  As our Granddaughter and I began to pull the pork apart and prepare my famous sauce concoction I caught my self getting all consumed with making my Mother's Day brunch one to remember. And it was!

Then it hit me like a ton of bricks!  And I mean a ton!!!  Do I understand the meaning of Mother's Day.  Yes, I bought flowers for my mother's that arrived two days before the actual holiday.  Yes, I spoke to both my mother's wishing them a "Happy Mother's Day".  Yet I was consumed with the NEED to define Mother's Day in my head.  As the day drew to a close I reflected: the brunch was fantastic!  We laughed, shared stories, and ate well.  Although my heart was a bit saddened that "my son" wasn't able to break away from obligations to join us I was still consumed with the meaning of Mother's Day!  Then this morning a light bulb went off in my head...how selfish of me!  How selfish am I to go to bed heavy hearted that "my son" was absent from my day?  I spoke to him!  I got a text from him!  I just didn't get a hug, card, flowers, or a story of remembrance while sitting on the deck that made us both laugh.  I was richly blessed because some Mother's didn't get a phone call, text message, flowers, hug, smile, or story of remembrance...their children had been called home for one reason or another.  And, I cried!  I cried hard!  I got angry at myself for being so selfish!  Then I realized that "my wishes" for Mother's day wasn't about a card, flowers, story of remembrance or even a hug...it was about NOT being recognized the way I thought I should be recognized.  My heart was heavy because my sisters were missing the same thing...

"Recognition of being a MOTHER"

Then I read an article from the Comfort Company - Gifts of Hope For Healing Hearts. Of the suggestions outlined in the article one piece caught my eye: Encourage Self-Care.  Mother's are so busy making sure everyone else is taken care of (children, siblings, parents, homes, and overall lives in general) we forget to encourage ourselves to take care of ourselves.  Because we fail to do this, we walk into holidays like Mother's Day with preconceived expectations.  We've worked hard to make sure you know you are loved unconditionally whether you are with us or waiting on us to join you in heaven.  In return we only ask for recognition...I truly think that's what our Husband's do!  Our husband's encourage self-care, love us as equally unconditionally as we love our children, and most important they RECOGNIZE us when children can't or chose not too in ways we expect them to.  So, I'm not going to walk, sleep, or think with a heavy heart anymore!  I'm going to appreciate everything my husband does for me because he fills the heavy heart with appreciation, praise, and gratitude for everything I do big or small...he RECOGNIZES me....he encourages "self-care".  So the moral to this blog IS this...if you feel consumed with confusion over Mother's Day and down deep inside wish the day wasn't even celebrated take a step back stop thinking about what the day "might have been IF" and HUG YOUR HUSBAND for honoring YOU!  And encouraging YOU to take care of yourself!  After all without Mother's where would any of us be right now? And without our Husbands/Fathers what would we think of ourselves?